Do You Want Cash Back? Are You Sure?

By Staff

Over time I have really started to despise Visa commercials. The particularly low ones are the “Life Takes Visa” spots which depicts a series of smooth Visa transactions which come to a screeching halt when some supposed Neanderthal uses cash, or heaven-forbid, writes a check. What makes the commercials particularly comical is that I have never been behind a speedy person in line swiping their Visa credit or debit card. Maybe it’s those idiotic POS terminals that throw a wrench into the wheels of commerce.

  1. Enter Your Pin Number. Not too difficult, assuming I can remember it since I’m told to never write it down, never disclose it to anyone, and guard it closer than a top secret classified document. I used to get cute and covert the numbers to letters and build a word, until I couldn’t remember the word plus the 17 passwords I have to remember at work.
  2. Do You Want Cash Back? No. I don’t want cash back. If I did I would visit an ATM machine or a bank. If I am swiping $97 worth of groceries chances are I don’t want to grab another $40 out of my checking account. Has anyone actually done a study to determine how many people get cash back from a pack of chewing gum? Sad thing is they are probably swiping a Visa card because they didn’t have $1.06 in cash to pay for the gum in the first place.
  3. Is the Amount Correct? You’re asking me if the amount is correct? As if I would question the computational power of today’s point-of-sale terminal? I always want to scuttle the whole process here and select “No.” When questioned I ask to speak to a manager and ask how many decimals the calculations are carried. If it is less than seven I launch into a five minute dissertation on the phenomenon of minute computational errors costing consumers billions in rounded up charges. For some reason I just haven’t had the guts to try this one.
  4. Are You Sure? Oh get on with it, my ice cream is melting! Yes, I’m sure, for the third time! Just deduct the $97 from my checking account as swiftly as you do in those commercials and we can move along.
  5. Waiting for Cashier. Am I on candid camera? What does the cashier have to do with this transaction? After all, she has been validating my coupons throughout this whole process and now we are dependent on her to hit an “OK” key to finalize things?
  6. Incorrect PIN. I need a drink.