Today I Lost My Best Friend, My Mom

I’m writing this post at 4:07am, and just a couple hours ago my mom passed away at 54 years young. For those who have followed along for a while, you are probably familiar with Mom’s medical struggles dating back 13 months.

I know it may seem strange to some that I’m even at a keyboard, but Mom’s now gone, the house is quiet with sleeping kids, and I’m turning to the activity that has always been therapeutic for me: writing.

Strange that through blogging we feel compelled to share life’s highs and lows with 10,000 complete strangers, but I don’t think of you as “complete” strangers. Over the last couple years I’ve made “virtual” friendships with many of you, and I enjoy sharing bits about my life with you all – the highs and the very, very lows.

I hope you’ll understand that I need a little time away from the blog to help settle my mom’s affairs, look after my grandfather, and grieve. I’ve lined up a couple guests posts for the week, and there may be a day or two between posts.

Thank you for all the thoughts and prayers expressed over these last 13 months.

I wrote a bit more about my mom in this post, The Path to Contentment

Comments

  1. Oh no…. I’m so sorry Frugal Dad. I’m sure she was happy you were with her. Your writing is an inspiration to us all. Please be well and stay hopeful. I’m going to e-mail you a story privately about something that will be published in the future. I hope you like it. Hang in there and bless you!

  2. I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot even fathom how hard it must be for you. Know that she suffers no more. We (your readers) will wait patiently for your return.

  3. I am so so sorry. I have been a loyal reader for over a year now. I have always called my mom my best friend also. I started crying as soon as I read your title. Know that my heart aches for you. I will keep you in my prayers and remain a loyal reader. Blessings for you and your family.

  4. i’ve been reading for awhile, never much of a commenter, but your thoughts and advice have been really inspiration to me and my family.

    i’m so sorry for your loss. my husband lost his mother at a young age, and the shock of it is still raw. please take care and take as much time as you need, we’ll be here when you are ready to come back. wishing you love and peace.

  5. Frugal Dad, our thoughts and prayers are with you and yours. She suffers no more, and that should be of some small comfort to you, though losing a parent is rough. Whether “virtual” or not, we are your friends, and will be with you every step of the way on this journey, and will patiently await your return. Do take care, and think of all the good things, and that she suffers no more.

  6. I read your blog, but this is my first comment. I can totally relate with my Dad passing away less than a year ago from a battle with cancer. I pray for peace for you in this time. Even in reading your post above I can sense your grief, but also your strength. Your family will no doubt need that in this time.

    Thanks for sharing,

    v

  7. Please accept my prayers for you and your family on your loss. As a new reader I was unaware of her illness, but I am sure that 54 is much too young to leave this world. There is a feeling of being an “orphan” than comes with losing your Mommy, no matter how old you are when it happens. As a hospice nurse and a motherless daughter, I know that you will be numb and “clueless” for a short while….be gentle to yourself and do NOT make any important decisions for a while. Hugs, Pattie

  8. I may have only commented once or twice,but each and every time that I read about your mom,I said a little prayer at my keyboard.I send my condolences(sp?)and will continue to pray for your family as you go through this time.

  9. Jason, I can’t begin to understand your grief, but I hope you know that you have a lot of friends out here that care about you and your family. We’re praying for you and hope you can find some peace in remembering your mom’s life and all she meant to you.

  10. Thoughts are with you. I’ve only recently begun hearing bits of the story, but I can only barely imagine what it’s like to go through. Take care of yourself over the next while, you have everyone’s support.

  11. I read your column daily and I am so sorry for your loss. I really appreciate your down to earth persona and have learned a lot from your blog. I miss my mom so much.
    earlwallace

  12. I gasped when I read the title of this post. I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. Take care of yourself and your family, and we’ll be patiently waiting your return. Much love and peace to you and yours.

  13. I remember reading all about your mom’s first trip into the hospital all those months ago. I am so sorry for your loss! Truly, losing my father four years ago, I empathize with the grief you are feeling right now. I will be praying for your comfort in the days to come.

  14. I am so sorry. My sister died 9 years ago at age 53, way too young. My father also passed away this year and my mom is sick in a nursing home. Grief strikes all of us at one time or another.

  15. I am truly sorry for your loss. Oprah says “When we lose an person we love, we gain an angel we know.” You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

  16. I’ve read your blog every day for the last year.

    What a Mom you had, May God hold her in the palm of his hands.. You are such a special man…

    Hugs..

  17. FD, my deepest condolences to you and your family for your loss. even when the end is expected, it is still hard. be gentle with yourself, take it easy, and relish the memories.

  18. Jason – I’d like to add my sympathies to all the others here on FrugalDad. I’m sure it is comforting to know that you have people all over the world praying for you during this difficult time. May God give you peace and comfort as only He can in this kind of circumstance. Ps 116:1-2.

  19. I feel like I can’t add much to all of the other heartfelt comments here, but I’m sorry for your loss. Best to you and your family at this difficult time.

  20. I am so sorry. I lost my mom in December to cancer, two weeks before my 25th birthday. Nothing can prepare you for it, even if you know it’s coming. I pray you and your family find peace. Again, I am so sorry.

  21. I’m so sorry to hear of your loss. I lost my mom at the age of 60, 2 years ago… You and your family will be in my prayers.

  22. I am so sorry for your loss. I remember being in the same daze when my father passed, as if it were someone else’s life you were watching. God bless.

  23. May God’s blessing be upon you and your family during this time. Just ask and he will give you strength. My prayers to you and yours.

  24. I’m sorry for your loss. The words ring empty, I know but the feelings are true. During this trying time, please don’t forget to stop for a few minutes and take care of yourself and your needs.

    My thoughts are with you and your family.

  25. I am so sad for your mother, you, your family, and all that knew your Mom. What a loss. Peace comfort to you and your family as you grieve.

  26. As with the other posters, I am very sorry for your loss. Know that there are lots of people out here thinking of you and your family.

  27. My dad passed a year ago. I understand your pain. You have so many friends that care about you here. When you feel isolated and depressed just remember that we are here for you.

  28. I am so sorry Frugal Dad for your loss. I know just a small piece of your story with your mom through your blog but have read, every time you wrote of her, how much you loved her and worried for her health.

    I’ll pray for your comfort while you mourn her loss.

  29. Your Mom will be in your heart forever. There is something wondrous about seeing someone move on to the next life. A calmness of spirit and everlasting peace.
    Traditionally our family does a graveside memorial service, and, sadly, I became an expert on the requirements and costs of interment. If you need any assistance, let me know.
    It will take some time to begin to forget the whirlwind year your family spent taking care of your Mom. Her struggles are over now and that is truly a blessing.
    I will hold your Mom and your family in the Light of God that is within us all.

  30. I don’t know how you feel, but the week my brother died went so fast, it didn’t even hit me for a few weeks after. Now it is excatly 3 months since he died. It hurts more than ever. But he is still with me. Your mom is with you too.

    Dear Lord,

    I pray you comfort frugaldad and his family in this time of grief. Remind them you are holding them in your mighty hand. Remind them of your great love. I pray that all that needs to get done does and the things that are trival are recognized as such. I pray that this tragedy would bring the entire family closer to you.

    In Jesus Name,
    Amen

    -Becky

  31. Jason, I lost my mom just over a year ago. It’s tough to go through. We had lost her really a couple years before due to Alzheimer’s but while it was expected for a long time it’s never easy. God bless you and your family.

    Roger

  32. I’m so sorry she died so young. With the physical pain of a root canal and the emotional pain of her loss, I hope you’ll take very good care of yourself in the months to come. If you find yourself mired in depression, please seek counseling immediately. I really enjoy your blog and wish you all the best.

  33. Never any goods words for the death of a beloved family member and especially your Mom.As a nurse I have great empathy for you and your family.The readers have sent good karma I hope it helps.Best wishes,Pam

  34. A mother’s love is never far from your heart as there is a special bond between a mother & child that even death cannot separate.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this time.

    With Sympathy…

  35. Hi Jason, That is wonderful that you and your Mom had such a great relationship. I’m very sorry for your loss. My Mom died quite a few years ago, and while she was older, it still seemed like she was too young. I’m sure I will always miss her, but the fun memories of her keep her alive. I hope your many wonderful memories help you through this. Take care.

    Take all of the time you need; I’m sure all of us will still be here when you get back.

  36. I am so sorry. I have never commented before and felt like I really needed to send my condolences and thank-you for all the wonderful information you share with us everyday.

  37. Jason–Telling your story in the middle of one of life’s deepest crises is therapeutic, not just for you, but for those of us who read about it. It helps us all to focus on what’s truly important, and maybe to be reminded of similar experiences we’ve had and maybe forgotten. That keeps us on the right path.

    Thank you for sharing this…

  38. Please accept also my sincere condolences for the loss of your mom. As long as you remember, she will ever be with you and yours. And remember those pennies from heaven…every time I find one on the ground, I just know it is my nephew of just 20 years of age who died tragically in a car accident who sent it my way. It always makes me smile. Peace, love, and strength.

  39. Thinking warmly of you and your family. I am sad for you, but relieved for your mom…the past year or so has not been easy for her. Thankfully, she is at peace now.

  40. My condolences to you and your family. Please know that we are all thinking of you and understand your departure. We’ll be here when you return, no doubt.

  41. Jason -

    Wanted to let you know I am praying for you. May the Lord send angels to comfort you and give you peace that your mother is resting in His care. Your loss and struggles coping with your loss, will build in you a compassion and empathy for others that will serve you well as husband, father, friend and writer. Blessings.

  42. I’m so sorry about your Mom. I’ve never bothered to comment on anything you’ve written but I’ve always looked forward to your posts and wished you well – so you are right we aren’t complete strangers – and our prayers are with you.

  43. Sincere condolences to you and your entire family on the loss of a mother, wife, mother-in-law, grandmother, friend – while she is at peace, the rest of you are left behind to grieve. Hope it helps knowing so many of us out here are offering you and yours our sympathies and prayers.

  44. I’m sorry for your loss. I know exactly how you are feeling right now. My mom passed away in April and she was the same age as your mom. Good luck with getting everything settled.

  45. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I probably read 10 financial blogs daily and I’ve never commented on one until now and it’s not financially related. In the end it’s our relationships that are most valuable not our money.

  46. Sorry this comes so late… my sympathies to you on the loss of your Mother. I know that your life will never be the same, but you will live and love stronger than you ever have in your life. I lost my Mom nearly 10 months ago and I feel for you. God bless you and your family.

  47. I feel your pain. I am a mom who lost her only child.
    I would love to try to be a mom to you.
    Maybe we could help fill our voids.

    Of course, we’d never be replacements…..but maybe help each other with our losses.

    christine

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